If you’re going to write “Yankees suck,” by all means, turn it into a vocabulary lesson

If you’re going to write “Yankees suck,” by all means, turn it into a vocabulary lesson

The analytical thinker (and writer) must soberly use facts to argue the case for the truth. But if you hate the Yankees — just viscerally hate them — and you’re literary enough, you can throw that out the window. That’s what David Bentley Hart did in his New York Times opinion piece. Here’s how it starts:…

Starbucks’ ambivalent apology for calling the Philadelphia police on two black guys
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Starbucks’ ambivalent apology for calling the Philadelphia police on two black guys

After police removed two black men from a Starbucks in Philadelphia in handcuffs, the Starbucks CEO has apologized. A lot of you wanted me to analyze this: half thought the apology was excellent, the other half terrible. So let’s take the thing apart and see why it’s so controversial. First, what happened in Philadelphia? The…

Syracuse University Police are ready to protect you from something they can’t tell you about
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Syracuse University Police are ready to protect you from something they can’t tell you about

The chief law enforcement officer at Syracuse University sent an email to everyone to tell them not to be afraid. This obscured the real purpose of the email, which was to cover his ass while not saying anything at all. Here’s the email that my friend got. I’ll highlight the weasel words and passive voice…

It’s, like, the ultimate weasel word. And it’s, like, really dumb to write it, President Trump.
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It’s, like, the ultimate weasel word. And it’s, like, really dumb to write it, President Trump.

Donald Trump tweeted that he’s “like, really smart.” Anything in writing that uses “like” in this way sets off alarm bells, because it’s the ultimate weasel word. Here’s Trump’s series of tweets. Now that Russian collusion, after one year of intense study, has proven to be a total hoax on the American public, the Democrats…

Facebook’s arrogant and patronizing statement about changes to the News Feed
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Facebook’s arrogant and patronizing statement about changes to the News Feed

Facebook’s News Feed shows both what your friends share and what companies that you follow share. In some countries, Facebook is ripping the company stuff out of the news feed. But publishers need not worry, because as it says in its patronizing, arrogant, and ultimately meaningless statement, it has “no plans” to make those changes…

New Hampshire has found the key to winning over Amazon: weasel words and passive voice

New Hampshire has found the key to winning over Amazon: weasel words and passive voice

it seems as if every community in North America is now vying to host Amazon’s second headquarters. These municipal pitch documents, located as they are at the intersection of politics, business, and fantasy, are solidly built on a ratio of one part statistics to five parts bullshit. I took a close look at the pitch…

New Equifax CEO Paulino do Rego Barros Jr. finally gets it right

New Equifax CEO Paulino do Rego Barros Jr. finally gets it right

Equifax interim CEO Paulino do Rego Barros Jr. published a piece in the Wall Street Journal about his company’s response to its data breach. The tone and substance are ideal. Why does it always take at least 3 tries for a company to get its apology and reaction right? The Barros Op-ed works because it’s sincere,…

Equifax statement dumping its CEO is a mass of weaselly mush

Equifax statement dumping its CEO is a mass of weaselly mush

Unsurprisingly, Equifax canned its CEO after the recent data breach. Er, not quite . . . actually he “retired.” The company is still caught between being responsible and avoiding blaming anyone. The language in the release — and the company’s own description of itself — reveal just how little the company stands for. Here’s the…